Question

What does it mean when an increasingly high number of my friends start popping up in that fucking "Boris + Doris" column?

Also: Patrick McIlheran is a complete tool.

Also also: I'll be attending a wedding and a Civil War re-enactment this weekend. Alcohol will be a factor; sufficient sleep will not. What could possibly go wrong?

Just like you, Matt Wild plays (played?) in a rock and roll band and is constantly broke. He has all his original hair, however, and weeps openly at baseball games.